As a relative newcomer to Active Rain, I am learning at a fast clip that there are many wide and varied opinions and that a lot of people can get very upset and speak out rather vociferously at times. Sometimes it’s to express anger or hurt and at other times it’s intended to insult or intimidate. I think this is odd but then again it’s not surprising. It’s easy to comment from the safety of your computer without being nose to nose with others and often I think that folks would never make some of the remarks they do in person. I have a little different perspective and it’s probably from my previous career.
I spent sixteen years working in different areas of the construction industry and as many of you may surmise, the communication styles are vastly different. Sometimes they are very *#%@!…different I have seen many times when arguments on the job site escalated to physical contact and outright fighting! When I first entered real estate, I was fortunate to work for a small upscale firm here in Austin that specialized in the luxury home market and though I had so many years in construction, I still came from a good family, was relatively educated and had been taught manners and tact. The broker at the company (did I mention that I was their first “token male”?) and my mentor taught me so much about the style and quality of doing business although she used to say “Russell is the easiest person with whom another agent can do transaction or the hardest, it all depends on their attitude!” Yes I was rather combative and aggressive in my negotiating style but over time she and my mentor polished my sharp edges and taught me when to be tough and when to be conciliatory and to always look at the big picture with an eye toward being REALISTIC!
I always welcome intense and passionate dialogue between folks but I do not respond well to insults or intimidation and I do not think anyone else does either.
In construction when you have an argument you might get socked in the nose. In real estate, people just talk behind your back or crab at you from the safety of their computer terminal and I can live with that!
I have often spoken out too quickly but I try to remember that words once spoken (or posted) are like rocks thrown and you can’t take them back!
Have a great week and let’s all try and remember to use a little tact!
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